CONFUSED IF IT’S PERIMENOPAUSE BEHIND HOW YOU’RE FEELING?

You’re used to being busy - your calendar’s packed with school pickups, work deadlines, and the mental load of managing a household. You’ve been juggling all the things for years, but something feels different now.

You’re more tired, snappier than you’d like to admit, and your favourite jeans? Let’s just say the elastic waistbands are winning these days.

It can feel disorienting, almost like you’re living in someone else’s body - like Jamie Lee Curtis in Freaky Friday when she swaps lives with her teenage daughter. Everything feels off - unfamiliar and frustrating - but you can’t quite put your finger on why.

Everyone says, “You’re a busy mum. Of course you’re exhausted and grumpy; feeling that way is normal!”

But why now? You’ve been this busy before, doing all the same things. Why does it feel so much harder lately?

Friend, you need to consider that it really could be perimenopause.

And before you roll your eyes and think, “No way, I’m too young for that!” let’s unpack a few common misconceptions that might be holding you back from finding the real cause behind how you’re feeling.

MYTH 1: “I’M TOO YOUNG FOR PERIMENOPAUSE.”

Most women assume perimenopause doesn’t start until their late 40s or 50s, but symptoms can start in your late 30s or early 40s.

Our culture often equates menopause with being “old,” so many of us assume the journey leading up to it - perimenopause - is still far off. Society tells us that menopause is about aging; and aging is about decline, pain, disease, and being irrelevant. Subconsciously, because we don’t want those things, we push the thought that it could be perimenopause or menopause away, hoping it’s still years down the road.

The reality? Perimenopause can start 2–12 years before menopause, and with the average age of menopause at 51, that means you could begin your perimenopause journey in your late 30s.

I’ve been there myself. At 42, I was struggling with mood swings, irritability, exhaustion and stubborn weight gain (though I hadn’t changed what I ate, drank, and did). Even though my hormone blood tests came back low, I was told I was “too young” for perimenopause. And because I was still breastfeeding, my doctor dismissed it entirely. I felt so frustrated by the lack of answers.

Luckily as a naturopath, I could figure it out on my own, but it still took me a while to change my thoughts around being too young for perimenopause - and a big part of that was because I was still breastfeeding! Talk about mind-blowing.

The shifts can be subtle at first: a little more tiredness here, a few mood swings there. Over time, though, they add up, leaving you wondering why your “normal” isn’t the same anymore.

Research even shows that women with a positive attitude toward aging live 7.5 years longer. That’s why understanding and embracing this phase of life is so important - it’s a time for change, not decline, and you have the power to influence how you age.

MYTH 2: “MY PERIODS ARE STILL REGULAR, SO IT CAN’T BE PERIMENOPAUSE.”

Many women assume that regular periods mean everything is fine. But hormonal fluctuations often start well before your cycle changes.

Think about your hormone production as an orchestra playing a symphony. For most of your life, the instruments in the orchestra that is your body kept a steady rhythm, creating a harmonious, predictable cycle. (Well, maybe not balanced for you all, but a cycle that is unchanged for now.)

But as you approach perimenopause, things start to sound slightly different, because some instruments are playing slightly off-key. It’s a subtle change, and one you only notice if you tune into the instruments that are changing. So while your periods might still arrive like clockwork, you feel a bit off, not quite yourself, and out of sync with your body, even though nothing obvious seems to have changed yet.

This is why paying attention to how you feel - not just what your calendar says - is so important. The subtle changes in your hormones might not disrupt your cycle just yet, but they’re still impacting your mood, energy, and body in ways you can’t ignore.

MYTH 3: “MY HORMONE BLOOD TESTS WERE NORMAL.”

Perhaps you’ve convinced your doctor to do some hormone blood tests, and they came back “normal.” So now you feel stuck, wondering why you’re still experiencing symptoms like mood changes, exhaustion, impatience, or headaches.

Your body’s hormone production isn’t like an instrument in the orchestra playing a single note over and over. Hormone levels fluctuate dramatically across the day, week, and month, so a single blood test often doesn’t tell the full story. It’s just one snapshot of a moment or note in a constantly changing symphony. It’s like listening to one beat from a symphony and assuming the rest of the piece is the same.

To make matters more complicated (and worse!), the normal ranges used by labs are incredibly broad and don’t reflect what’s optimal for you.

This is why the gold standard for diagnosing perimenopause isn’t a blood test - it’s your symptoms. It’s about looking at the big picture over a period of time, not just a single snapshot.

If the engine light in your car comes on, you don’t ignore it just because the car passed its last inspection. Your symptoms are your body’s way of signalling that something needs attention, even if the test results don’t show it. Put it this way, if the engine light in your car comes on, you don’t ignore it just because the car passed its last inspection.

MYTH 4: “IT’S JUST STRESS OR BURNOUT.”

Stress and busyness are easy culprits for feeling tired and irritable, especially when you’re juggling family, work, and everything else. But stress doesn’t exist in isolation - your response to stress is deeply connected to your hormones.

During perimenopause, your body produces less progesterone, the hormone that helps keep you calm and balanced. Without it, your ability to handle stress naturally declines, making everything feel harder.

Imagine running a marathon with sneakers that have lost their cushioning - you’re still moving forward, but every step feels heavier, and hurts more than it used to.

So yes, stress is a factor, but if you’re feeling worse now than you did with the same level of busyness or stress a few years ago, hormones are likely playing a role.

Addressing the root cause can make all the difference. But this doesn’t just mean getting rid of all your stressors - let’s be real, that’s impossible! Instead, it’s about supporting your nervous system and adrenal glands so your body is better equipped to handle the load.

WHAT YOU CAN DO NEXT

If any of this sounds familiar, it’s time to get curious about what’s really going on with your body and take a closer look at what your what your body is telling you via your symptoms.

I created The Perimenopause Decoder to help women like you figure out if perimenopause might be behind how you’re feeling. This free resource also breaks down the different phases of perimenopause so you can see how much longer you may have on the perimenopause roller coaster!

FINAL THOUGHTS

Feeling exhausted, moody, or overwhelmed isn’t just “normal” or something you need to put up with because you’re a busy mum. It could be your body’s way of saying it needs support.

Perimenopause might not be something you’ve thought about before, but understanding it could be the key to reclaiming your energy, mood, and life! (Because even if it is perimenopause making you feel this way, you don’t need to resign yourself to putting up with it!)

Ready to take the guesswork out of how you’re feeling? Download the Perimenopause Decoder today and start your journey to feeling confident and comfortable in your body again.